Talk about awkward.
I haven't written this post in months because, well, I don't know what to say. I can't say that I want to get back into this. I can't say I missed it all that much while I was gone. What I CAN say is that I hate randomly clicking in to see that fucking Nutcracker staring me back at my face. I can only imagine how annoying that is for you.
[[tap tap taps into microphone...hello?... is anyone actually still out there?]]
Really, I haven't written anything because I haven't come to any conclusions; not feeling pressured to post has been refreshing, but something just hasn't let me bring this thing to a close. I always thought I would come back. And I still might. But mostly it felt cheap to leave it like that.
To be fair, the five of you who actually read this thing I know I talk to in real life, so it felt unnecessary to make some big proclamation. But maybe. Just maybe there are others out there.
What I'm reeeeeeeeally thinking I didn't want to say because I don't want to offend anyone. But, whatever, let me say it with one big disclaimer beforehand:
I READ BLOGS ALL THE TIME -- CONSTANTLY, HABITUALLY, INCESSANTLY (don't fire me, please) -- AND LOVE, LOVE BLOGS AND DON'T WANT THEM TO CHANGE AND DO NOT JUDGE OTHER PEOPLE'S CONTENT IN THE LEAST. DO WHAT YOU DO, GIRL, CAUSE I LOVE IT.
With that said.
I go back and read my shit and it just feels so trivial and vain, and it makes me cringe. Pretty shoes are not what I'm wanting to highlight at this time. But I'm also not sure if I want to use this thing as a public diary [oh dear god, I hope not]. Or even worse for you, my own personal soap box [would you hate that as much as I would love it? really -- I'm wondering].
Soooooooooooooooooooo. I ended up in silence.
Remember when I said I didn't know what to say?? Well, I sure said a whole lot WHILE saying nothing at all. It's a secret trick of mine.
If anything, what I really want to say is I'm sorry to bail on you with no word.